You and I are following two different wars. There was Minsk 1 and 2, neither worked (and Budapest before that). Sure, if Ukraine gave up all its weapons Russia would stop. But then Ukraine would be part of Russia. There's nothing "to work out" from Russia's side until that happens.
So the simple question is why should Ukraine de-militarize and become part of the Russian Federation because you say so? I understand you're not telling them to do anything, you'd just like to help in ending the war--but what war have you ever stopped between your friends or family? Are conflicts in your family always equal--both parties completely half right? If your friend starting shooting people randomly would you try to negotiate or call the police?
You're reading too much into government by saing it's 'good and evil' or 'democracy autocracy'. That's just a rally cry. The Germans and Japanese weren't fought because of the holocaust or Nanking, which weren't widely understood until after the war. They were fought because other people in the world didn't want to live under German or Japanese rule. It's really as simple as that.
Here's a video I strongly recommend that says what I was trying to tell you about U.S. support. Hope you're well!
